i dream....

....of always making and eating good food, of being pleasant and being treated nicely, of living in an environment which i adore, looking at colors and things that i like, of listening to things that tickle my ears, of having people and things around that i have chosen, of bringing my imagination to a fruition,
things can be amiss and can take forever to get done but in my world that is okay.
i imagine that i am abit crazy, but i like it that way because..IN CRAZINESS THERE IS BRILLIANCE...i wish more people recognized that!
i imagine dancing in my world, lots of it! i choreograph things in my head and wish my body could do what i imagine.
it would be quite....erotic, fulfilling, satisfying...to see a piece danced which was MY own creation. when SYTYCD choreographers are crying at a piece...I GET IT!!!
a combo of music and movement and my imagination in tangible form? decadence!
i imagine a life where i can imagine, and that would be okay! i feel like people, almost intentionally, rip me out of my world sometimes and i don't get it!
come into MY world! it is much nicer here! WHY must you be so literal? dream a little! this is the only life we get! you gonna live it literally or live it like you desire?
everyone needs to put glitter polish on! seriously!
why look, everyday, at nails, anything, you do not like? or a couch you hate? or talk to a person who annoys you? or go home to an uncomfortable bed? or take a shower and hate your body? FIX IT DAMMIT!
why listen to music you don't like? or a tv show instead of something else?
if you put yourself into perspective.....you are a flash in the stream of time! the "world" is changing and moving on and in 100 years this time will be a quip in some history journal, if that!. it won't matter if you seemed crazy or flighty or irresponsible...enjoy it, dammit!
and when you look at me with those criticizing, questioning, wondering eyes, just remember to look back and ask YOURSELF! have YOU done what you have dreamed to do?

July 2011!

Where in the *BLEEP* does time go?
wasn't it just christmas time?
i MUST write a book!
nails are painted red with glitter!
went to LA a couple weeks back and got my friends and family fix
reading a book on "his needs, her needs"
feeling a bit disconnected and m and i are not speaking the same language.
sister is in early labor but not due until july 29th!
she seems miserable...tired, swolen feet etc
annie is moving to phoenix, wayyyy closer than LA
have a few projects going...a sewing one for a 3 year old and my new bottle bling!
peace!